Saturday, September 13, 2014

Dancer's Complaint

I dance at a Deja Vu.  Things are tight but I've always been able to rely on one special customer who comes in once a week to see me.  He is my true big spender.  Every Thursday night he comes in when we run the $100 half-hour and he buys at least two and sometimes three.  Then he tips me at least $100 and often $200 and on my birthday two months ago, he gave me $400.  Obviously, I count a lot on this guy to help me make my rent each month.  He sometimes spends another $100 or $200 on tipping other stage dancers or getting privates with them.

Last night, he came in and we did three half-hours dances and he tipped me $200.  After we came out, we wanted to sit and talk a while so he sat down on a couch and I went back to the dressing room to freshen up and put the money in my locker.

At this Deja Vu, they have all sorts of special deals about sitting in certain booths.  I have never understood them and neither have any of the dancers I asked about this.  It seems you have to pay a certain fee to sit in the booths on one side of the room.  In all my time dancing at this club, I think I've only seen one or two parties sit there on a crowded Saturday night and I don't think they paid for the privilege because they knew someone.

My great customer sits on the couch waiting for me to return and while I'm gone, a manager goes up to him and says that's a V.I.P. couch and he can't sit there.  He wasn't hurting anyone and there were no V.I.P.s in the club who wanted to sit on that silly couch.  There's nothing special about that couch. and the club was practically empty.

My customer got annoyed at the manager's tone and he said, "Fine.  I won't sit anywhere in this crappy club of yours" and he said he wouldn't be back and asked him to tell me the same thing.  Then he walked out.

When the manager told me about this, I thought he was crazy.  This was a guy who just spent $500 in the club and who dependably spends at least that much each week and they're driving him away because of some stupid rule about a stupid couch that no one ever sits on anyway at a time when the club is almost empty!

The manager tells me rules are rules, which is bullshit.  I see him bending rules all the time for his friends.

I don't know what to do about this.  I'm not sure I can survive without this customer's weekly spending on me.  I would contact him and beg him to come back but don't have any way of contacting him.

Well, one of the first rules of being a dancer these days is to get an email address or cell phone number for any steady or affluent customer.  A lot of dancers set up separate email accounts like with GMail for their dancer correspondence.  Some of them even get a separate cell phone like one of those pay as you go cell phones they sell at Walmart so they can stay in touch with customers without giving out too much personal information or mixing their business with their personal lives.

What if you suddenly had to change clubs?  How would your regulars find you?

I spoke recently to a dancer who has this down to a science.  She has a separate cell phone number.  She exchanges this number with any customer she wants to have come in and see her.  When she gets to work, she takes a nude selfie that doesn't show her face or has one of the other girls take it for her.  Then she texts the pic to some guys with a little message that says "I'd love to see you".

It reminds them that she's at work and that she's naked.  She thinks half her customers are there because of these messages.

She occasionally works different clubs.  She sends out texts to tell the guys where she's working and when.

So that's the second thing you're doing wrong.  The first is you're working for idiots.

I swear, I have heard so many stories of stupid strip club managers, I'm sometimes ashamed to admit I used to be one.

The guy's first mistake was probably that he's unaware of who the big spending regulars are in his club.  You cannot make intelligence decisions if you don't know that.

If he did know that guy was a big spending regular and he pulled that shit about the couch anyway, then he's really a moron.

Strip club managers need to understand they are in the ENTERTAINMENT BUSINESS!  Their number one concern is to make sure the customer feels welcome and has a good time.

You say he lets his friends sit on that couch without paying.  He should treat every guy who walks in like his friends.  He should especially do that with a guy who is spending $600 or $700 every week!

There's nothing you can do about idiot strip club managers but you can build up a customer list.  If nothing else, that will help you if the manager drives you to another club.

Friday, September 12, 2014

Roll Calls

At the club I frequent (DVNH), they use to do stage roll calls (blue lights) on the hour, during daytimes. At night, it is usually every 30 minutes, sometimes as much as every 15-20 minutes.

But now during days, they NEVER do stage roll calls. They do blue lights on the floor, but have don't do stage roll calls.

Does it make much strip club business sense NOT to do stage roll calls? For me, I don't like it, because I don't get to examine the merchandise before getting a dance. And the girls usually never come out.

What do you think? Good or bad for business NEVER to do stage roll calls.

I have been to Deja Vu North Hollywood though only in the evenings. It's a good club but odd in that sometimes, it's packed and sometimes, it's empty and the girls I asked all said they had no idea why the crowds were so unpredictable. There are some nights when there are 20 girls on the stage and 3 guys in the house.

I don't really understand their roll calls. They hustle all the girls out there and the girls stand there awkwardly, clustered together so you can't really see them. (It also doesn't help that they keep their stage too dark with too many trick lighting effects).

Then the D.J. calls off some names of girls that his computer screen tells him should be on stage and sometimes aren't as the girls walk off. No attempt is made to identify any of the girls by name which might help if some guy saw a girl he liked and wanted to ask a waitress to fetch her.

Sometimes, a guy gets up on stage with them and acts like anyone gives a shit about him being up there. If I was managing a club right now, I would do away with that and with the stupid bit where they bring up a guy who's having a birthday party or bachelor party and have a few girls give him a lap dance then have him give one of them a lap dance. I know it generate some tip money for the D.J. but it's stupid and audiences hate it. My rule would be nobody on the stage who has a penis.

I don't think it makes any sense to not do roll calls and it doesn't make a lot of sense to do them the way DVNH does in the evening. Try having the girls parade across the stage in a line and be identified by name. There are many good things about that club but they should light the stage better and give you a chance to see the girls and to know their names.

BTW, DVNH has two big TV screens on either side of the stage that run promotional videos. If there's no cute woman on stage and you're bored, try watching the videos and see how many spelling mistakes you can spot in them. There are usually a lot of them.

Saturday, September 6, 2014


Do you tip a fixed percent or do you reduce the percent if you get more dances. For example, if I get one dance that costs $30, I may give $40. However, if you get 6 dances, then $240 seems excessive.

I don't have a fixed percentage.  It's kind of an instinctual thing and it sometimes has a lot to do with how much money I have on me.

The main consideration is whether I want to see this dancer again.  I will tip more if I do.

A few nights ago, my friends and I stopped in at Deja Vu North Hollywood and I got a $100 half hour from a very cute young lady.  She got totally naked immediately and spent the half hour climbing all over me, letting me touch everywhere and acting like she was enjoying it as much as I was.  There was some light kissing and she paid plenty of attention to the front of my pants.

This was as much as I would have expected in this club.  Dancers are taking a big risk to go farther than that.

I tipped her $50.

BTW, my current lady friend is a former dancer.  She is traveling a lot lately and is away and she knows that I go to strip clubs when she is away.  She always says "Make sure you tip them well".

Friday, September 5, 2014

Letter of the Month

How do I get the strip club in my neighborhood closed down?

The neighborhood I live in has a strip club that is helping to ruin my neighborhood. Shootings, robberies, drug usage/sales, prostitution, assault, sexual assault, and a murder have all taken place at this club in its 8 years of existence. This club is down the street from a high school and middle school.

I have been inside and spoken to some of the dancers. Some of them are students trying to make money to complete their educations. Some are single mothers who just want to make money to support there children. One of them told me she was dancing to save her mother's house from foreclosure. Yes, some of these girls have sympathetic stories.

Yet, a few were on drugs. One got rather nasty with me, because after telling her I didn't want a dance I ONLY gave $5. A lot of them seem unmotivated to get a real job.

I'm very liberal and believe anyone that wants this sort of thing should be permitted to find it, but not in my neighborhood.

How does one go about getting this out of their neighborhood? I apologize if you take offense to my feelings toward this.

I don't believe this message is legit.

If the club has really had shootings, robberies, drug usage/sales, prostitution, assault, sexual assault, and a murder, then the police should have closed it down long ago.  Do you think they would allow a McDonald's to stay open if it had a history of shootings, robberies, drug usage/sales, prostitution, assault, sexual assault, and a murder?

I also don't see why you're going inside and patronizing a place that has had shootings, robberies, drug usage/sales, prostitution, assault, sexual assault, and a murder.

If you are a casual visitor, I doubt any dancers would have let you know they were on drugs or that you'd learn a lot about why the girls are dancing there.

It's also kind of assholish to say it's fine for horrible, dangerous business to exist as long as it endangers other people and not me by being in my neighborhood.

If your story is true, then call the police and ask them why a business is allowed to operate that has shootings, robberies, drug usage/sales, prostitution, assault, sexual assault, and a murder.

I don't take offense to anything except that you think I'd believe your story.  My position is that any sort of business that does have shootings, robberies, drug usage/sales, prostitution, assault, sexual assault, and a murder should be closed.  It should not be closed if all that happens there is that men get to pay to watch women dance nude.

Wednesday, September 3, 2014


Another dancer tipped me off to your site and I find it very useful and helpful.  I dance at a club that I usually like.  It is really the only club around for me to work.  The other choices are either too far or there is something wrong with them.  I had a bad experience working at one of them and I know about the others and am sure I would not be happy at them.  Here is a problem I just had at the club where I work and I hope you can advise me on it because moving to another club is not an option.

The club charges $40 a dance and the dancer gets half plus keeps all tips minus the tip out.  I have a regular who is one of my best customers.  He comes in at least once a week, gets 6 dances and lets me keep the change from $300.  He is also very nice on a personal level to me.

Last week, he came in and we did what I thought were 7 dances.  He said it was 6 but this guy Al who monitors the lap booths agreed with me it was 7 so the bartender told the customer he had to pay for 4.  He was pissed but he paid $280 instead of $240.  My tip was $20 instead of $60.

After he left, I told Al I wasn't sure it had been 7 dances.  Al said, "It wasn't.  It was 6."  He said it was club policy that when the number was in dispute, everyone had to say it was the higher number.  He said that if he thought it was 7 and I thought it was 6, I was supposed to lie and say it was 7.  He said, "We always charge the higher number."

This policy cost me $40 and that's bad enough but it may have also cost me this regular.  He hasn't come in since then.  He looked annoyed when he left like it really mattered to him even though he still spent the same amount he always does.

Do you think my club is wrong?  What should I do?

Your club is wrong.  In fact, your club is stupid.  In a dispute, you always go with the lower number.  This applies to everyone but it especially applies to a good tipping regular.  It is idiotic to piss off a guy who comes in at least once a week and spends $300 even if the club only gets $120 of it.

What should you do?  I would politely let the manager know that his policy cost you a regular like that.  Maybe he will learn from the experience.  If he doesn't, you are stuck with working at a club that does something stupid.  In the future, you might try counting dances more accurately so a dispute doesn't arise.

Saturday, August 23, 2014

New Job for a Dancer

My girlfriend is planning to quit working at a no extras club in a year.  She has worked there way too long - 10 years and she realizes she has to get out.  But she is scared to do this as she has not had a real job ever.

Any advice on how to make this transition easier?

Her first problem will probably be that her new job will be stricter about schedules.  One of the appeals of stripping for many women is that most clubs are not that strict about girls being on time and you can often take off a night or day whenever you feel like it.  It is not likely your girlfriend's new job will be that flexible.

She might make her transition easier if she works towards maintaining a rigid schedule in her strip job.

She will also have to develop a decent look for her makeup each day.  She probably won't be making herself up as much at her new job as does in the strip club.

She will have to understand a new kind of job performance.  Just what that will be will depend on what her new job is but it will certainly not be the same as selling a certain number of lap dances per shift.

She will have to remember that in her new job, she is not a woman to be ogled or fondled and she will have to not invite that.

Lastly, if her job involved interacting with the public, there may come a moment when someone comes in who will recognize her from her old job.  She will have to be prepared to deal with that and to not get flustered or panicked.  If she looks different enough, she might get away with denying tat she ever worked in a strip club.  If not, she may have to whisper to the customer and ask him to please keep her secret.

She probably will not want her new employers to know about her old employers and will have to have a good answer to the question of where she worked the last 10 years.

Sunday, August 17, 2014

Leaving the Girls Alone

I recently got fired from my job at a strip club on trumped up charges of sexually harassing entertainers.

The truth was the owner's friend needed a job and mine became available all of a sudden.

Did you ever deal with this situation in the past and how was it resolved.

I had to deal with employees sexually harassing dancers.  In those cases, the charges were not trumped up.  In one case, it was a guy who on his first week on the job began to saying to the girls "Suck my dick or I'll get you fired".  I had told him when he was hired that we didn't do that kind of thing but he thought that was just a speech I had to give for legal protection and I didn't expect it to be followed.

When I told him it was true, he looked at me like I was crazy and said "Why the fuck would I want to work here then"?

I did have the owner sometimes ask me to find a job for a friend or a relative but I never had to fire anyone to make room for them.  Those people never worked out, BTW.  In one case which I think I related here, the guy really began hitting on the girls and he had to go.

I don't know what to tell you about your situation except that you were probably fortunate to get out of that place.

Monday, August 11, 2014

Posting Schedules

My favorite club is a 40-minute drive from where I live. I am a regular, visiting 4-8 times per month, and I don’t have any one specific dancer I go to see. Rather, they all know that I will usually buy dances from multiple girls when I visit. As such, I try to time my visits so that I can see a variety of dancers during one trip, including at least a few of my favorites. Most nights there are 10 to 15 girls working, and when the club is really busy there might be as many as 25.

The club doesn’t post the dancer schedules on their site, and when I call I’m usually told that they can’t give me the entire list of dancers. The best they can do is let me ask about 3 or 4 specific dancers and they’ll tell me if those girls are currently at the club. And if the girls I ask about are not currently there, they will not answer questions about whether the girl is scheduled to come in later that night.

If I ask about 4 girls and none or even only 1 are working, then I usually decide not to make the drive. I hate going all that way for 1 great girl and 8 others who don’t interest me. But if they gave me the full lineup, I might decide that there were enough others who I find attractive to warrant driving all the way out there.

I’m thinking there must be a logical reason for this policy, as I’ve experienced it with other clubs as well, but I’m not sure what it might be. In my mind, providing the schedule is great marketing for the club, so I have trouble understanding why they wouldn’t want to actively promote it (on the website, through social media, etc.), and further why they actively try to keep the information from getting out.

Is it a case of the club management thinking that providing this information actually discourages visits? Is there a security/safety concern for the girls? Are they afraid that a husband/boyfriend or stalker is trying to monitor a girl’s schedule? I’m thinking it could be something along these lines, but then it wouldn’t make much sense given that they are willing to answer questions about specific girls, just not all the girls at once.

In my view, there are probably many customers like me who would show up more often if this information were readily available.

Thanks in advance for any comments and insight you can lend, and please keep up the great work with the blog!

There may not be a logical reason for this policy.  It may just be that the management is lazy.

If there is a reason, it is probably that the lineup is unimpressive.  Every manager knows that certain girls have regulars who come in to see them and other girls don't have much of a following.  If he tells you that there are only three girls in the second category working, you won't come in.  If he leaves it more of a mystery, there's a chance that you will come in.

It's not a safety concern for the girls.  If it was, no club would post lineups or answer phone questions.  If the dancer was afraid of a boyfriend or husband monitoring her schedule, the first thing she would do is change her dancer name.

The other problem is technical.  A lot of clubs haven't gotten around to setting up a website where they can easily post lineups.  They haven't even bothered to open a Twitter account.

Some of them don't want to post on ZBone or Boned In because they don't want the customers to be able to comment on the lineup or they don't want their customers going to those sites to read what other customers say about the club or the girls.

One of the clubs I visit is real sloppy about posting their lineups.  Sometimes they do and sometimes they don't.  If they don't and I call up and I'm polite, I can usually get someone to just read me the list.

The last time I did that, the person on the phone said they hadn't posted it yet because they were still waiting for certain girls who were late to get there.  He didn't want to put up a bad lineup and he was waiting until it got good enough to post.

P.S. If I were running a club today, I would post and update lineups constantly.  I would have a Twitter account and I would have my managers send a tweet whenever even one new girl showed up to work.  Think of it as an excuse to send a free ad out to people who have indicated they are interested in your product.  Why not send them five or ten free ads a day?  I would set up my club website so all the tweets were posted there automatically also.

Deja Vu North Hollywood has recently set up their site so it shows you a live feed of the girls dancing on the stage and you can watch for free.  There are some issues with this.  Some of the best girls left because of it but one good thing is that the site is constantly updated to show which girls are working at the moment.  Anyone considering going there can go to the site and know pretty much who is there at the moment and can even see some of the girls.  This is the best possible real time roll call and I'll bet it is helping their business.  I do not recommend all clubs put live video on the web but I do think they should have good real time roll calls.

Saturday, August 9, 2014


My local club in Ohio has $10 cover charge, but they hand out free passes enough that I don't really have to pay for that.  Dances are $30 each.  No drink minimum, and really no drink hustles.   Question: what kind of budget ($/month) I should plan on to have a decent experience?  How much would you spend for a good visit?  $200, $300, $400?

Well, this depends on what you can afford.  I make pretty good money so what I would spend may not be what some other guys would spend.

I think you have to decide what you want out of the experience.

One thing that has changed for me in the last few years is that I like having regular friends in clubs.  There was a time when I would go to a strip club and try to dance with a new girl each time.  Now, I am more likely to find someone I really like and go in to see her.  In the past, this has sometimes led to a relationship outside the club.

In those situations, you have to overspend a little.

Let me put it this way.  My business sometimes takes me to different cities, especially Indianapolis, Chicago and Atlanta.  I tend not to go a lot to strip clubs in those cities because there's no point in building up a personal relationship with a dancer since I won't be back there for another year or two.  If I do go to a strip club, I just get one-time dances.

In those situations, I figure on trying a few different girls out with one dance apiece and then to maybe have a long (3-5 dances) session with the one I like best.  So I would budget that visit for eight or so dances which at your club means $240.  Figure I would spend another $40 tipping girls on stage or servers and I would get a drink or two so $300.

I might have one or two hundred dollar bills in the secret compartment in my wallet just in case I find the sexiest woman I've ever met in my life but I would not plan on spending them.

I'm not going to tell you how much to spend a month because I don't know how many visits a month would satisfy you but I think $300 a visit is good number.  I don't spend my money that way in a strip club as often as I used to.

These days, I go to local clubs 2 or 3 times a month.  I almost always go to see one dancer who has caught my eye on a previous visit there.  I always plan to spend $200 to $225 on that dancer.  I will spend about $150 on dances with her and then give her the remainder as a tip.  If you add in stage tips and drinks and maybe test-driving one other dancer, you're back to $300.

This is all for a club that charges $30 a dance.  If a dance is $20, the $300 would be closer to $200.

Keep in mind that some clubs charge for parking or for admission or drinks may be more.  In some, you may get hustled into buying drinks for dancers or have to tip a men's room attendant.

I am aware that $300 is about what you might pay in some situations for a session with a hooker who will do more than any dancer.  This is one of the reasons business is down in strip clubs.  I personally choose not to spend money on hookers.  I don't criticize anyone who does.

Thursday, July 31, 2014

Interview with Kat, Part 3

There are other questions my readers like me to ask like, "Breasts, real or fake?"

Which do you think?

The safe answer is real because if they're fake, you'd feel complimented if I was wrong.  If I said fake and I'm wrong, you'll get insulted.

So which is it?

I'm going to go with fake.

That's what everyone thinks but they're not.  You can feel them if you don't believe me.

I believe you.  Hope you're not insulted.

No, just the opposite.  I think it's a compliment that God gave me what some women pay for.

Do you miss anything about dancing?

I miss the exercise.  I miss the other girls.  I miss certain guys.

How about giving blow jobs?

Well, I haven't given that up.  I just do it with guys I like.

Do you really enjoy giving blow jobs or is it just something you do to get men to talk to you?

[LAUGHS]  At first, I think I did it so they'd talk to me but yeah, now I really enjoy it.  I like feeling him get hard in my mouth.  I like driving him crazy, getting him to the point where he can't hold back.

So where does he get to come?

Well, in the club, it was usually in my mouth.  I mean, where else?  Anywhere else was messy.

Spit or swallow?

In the club, spit.  I kind of saved swallowing for guys I knew real well.  I'd always take some kleenex into the booth to spit into and to clean him up.  Oh, can I tell you about the whipped cream girl?


I was working at this club where the management was like, give blow jobs if you like but not with everyone, not with first-timers, not with guys who might be cops, you know.  The manager said, "I'll look the other way for one a night" so the girls who did it only did it once a shift or sometimes twice.  Well, there was this one girl.  Her dancer name was Molly, I think.  She was leaving in two weeks.  She was moving out of town.  So since this was her last two weeks, she said, "I'm going to make as much money as I can and I don't care if I get fired."  So she got this little can of whipped cream.  I never knew it came in such a small size but she had one.  Actually, I think she had a couple in her locker.  She'd go up to guys and offer to cover their dicks with whipped cream and lick it off.  I think she offered this to every guy in the club where it wouldn't mean cutting in on some other dancer's customer.

What did she charge for this valuable service?

Whatever she could get.  Well, no.  It had to be at least fifty dollars or so.  I think she'd start at $300 if the guy looked like he had it

Fifty dollars to do that sounds like a bargain.

Well, that's the thing.  Even if they agreed on fifty, she usually got a lot more because that just bought you the cream thing.  If you wanted her to lick you until you came, that was extra.

Ah, I get it.  She gets the guy as horny as possible and then she hits him with the extra charge to finish the job.

Yeah.  She said, "I didn't promise you could come in my mouth or anything.  I promised to lick the whipped cream off your dick."  She kept her promise.

And at that point, the guy's so horny, he'll shell out a lot more money to go the rest of the way.  Were some of the guys mad?

Some, I guess.  But she delivered what she promised for the price.

That's very clever.

She was risking getting fired but so what?  She was leaving there anyway.  She made a lot of money.

Now, I know which club this was and this was not a club known for high mileage and blow jobs.

No, I don't think so.

When a dancer comes in and starts doing a lot of that kind of thing, management may stop her because they're worried about getting busted but I've seen other dancers get real upset.  They don't want to be working at a club when it gets busted even if they didn't do anything.  And all the guys who come in start expecting the same thing from them.

Yeah.  For weeks after, I had guys coming in asking me if I did the whipped cream thing.  There was one guy she fucked who after she left couldn't understand that every girl there didn't fuck.

That's always a problem.  I talked to a girl who worked for a while in City of Industry.  Most of the customers who walk in the door assume every dancer in the City of Industry delivers full service.

Guys were always telling me that.  If I told them they couldn't pull their dicks out or get me to sit on them, they'd say, "I can do this at this place in City of Industry.  Why can't we do that here?" and I'd have to tell them, "Because this isn't City of Industry and if I wanted to do that kind of thing, I'd be working down there."

You're not the first dancer who's told me that.  Did you ever work down there?

Down there?  No.  Too far to drive.  And I wouldn't do anything down there I wouldn't do closer to home.  I didn't give every guy a blow job.

Let's say you give a guy a blow job and he comes in your mouth.  I'm talking now about a boy friend, not a customer in a strip club.  What can he do to return the favor?

Well, what I usually do with Jason is that I suck him until he's hard, then he fucks me until I come, then I finish the blow job off and he comes in my mouth.  Actually, he likes to come all over my face sometimes.

What else do you like?

Just about anything.  Fingers.  Licking.

Let's put it another way.  What can't he do to you?

What do you mean?

What might a guy, a lover want to do to you that would cause you to say no?

I'm not into pain or being tied up or spanked or anything like that.  I let a guy tie me up and fuck me once because it seemed to be so important to him and it was his birthday but I didn't get anything out of it.  I'm not really into role playing.  Like, a guy might say, "You be Gladys the Chambermaid and I'll be Mr. Jones, the rich mansion owner" or something and I'll say, "How about if you be you and I be me and we just make love?"

How about anal?

Once in a while.  Again, if it makes him happy.

And if it's his birthday?


Okay, how do I please you on your birthday?

Flowers.  A thoughtful gift.  We get dressed up and we go somewhere really beautiful and fun.  Then we go to a beautiful bedroom somewhere, like in a hotel, and we sip fine wines and we undress slowly and we just kiss and hug and touch and give each other massages and then comes the sex.

What kind of sex?

Almost any kind.

What if a guy said, "It's your birthday so I'm going to order in a pizza and some beer and we're going to rip each other's clothes off and fuck for an hour"?

I could get into that.  Yeah.