Monday, September 29, 2014

Low Mileage???

The other day here I posted about a dancer who offered me a blow job, including coming in her mouth and shooting the experience on my cell phone for $100.

I just spotted a review of her on one website.  The guy described her as "low mileage."

I'm guessing that review tells us more about the reviewer than it does about the girl.  I'm guessing she didn't offer him that because he didn't bathe or tip or talk nicely to her.

Saturday, September 27, 2014

I Thought I'd Heard Everything

I'll bet I've been in more strip clubs and gotten more private dances than anyone reading this blog.  Every so often, something happens that still surprises me.

I was in a club the other night.  There was a dancer who I'm sure a lot of guys would have found attractive.  She wasn't my type but you might have loved her.

She was hitting me up for dances and I wasn't interested in her.

In a very sweet way, she offered me a blow job for $100.  When I was younger, I might have jumped at that no matter what she looked like.  Now, I look for more of a Girl Friend Experience and a quick blow job is usually too impersonal.

I guess she was surprised that I said no.  She whispered to me that I could come in her mouth.

Again, I would have jumped at that years ago.  If I hadn't said yes the first time, I would have said yes this time.

I thanked her but said no.

All of this has happened to me before including the part when I said no.

Then she made an offer I've never heard before.  She said "Do you have a cameraphone?  You could shoot a movie or take photos of me sucking your cock".

It takes a lot to surprise me in a strip club but that did it.

I thought for a second.  The lighting in those private booths is shit.  My cameraphone wouldn't have picked up much.

Also, this was not a club that had a lot of super high mileage.  A dancer who knows where the cameras are will usually know how to do something like that so all the camera sees is the back of her head.  If I had my cameraphone out and was shooting, that would have made it pretty obvious.

I said no.

I left wondering if I had just gotten a preview of strip clubs of the future.

Sunday, September 21, 2014

Why Some Dancers Don't Make More Money

The other night I was in a club and I saw a dancer on stage I thought was absolutely beautiful.  I'm sure some men wouldn't have gone for her but she was just my type.

What was her name?  I don't know.  This was one of those clubs where you can't hear a fucking thing the disc jockey says.  I don't understand why the management doesn't correct that.  Why even have a disc jockey if you can't understand what he's saying.

If he said the dancer's name, I couldn't make it out.

She did two dances on stage.  By the end of the first one, she was topless and I was ready to commit to several private dances with her if she didn't have a penis when the bottoms came off.

She didn't.

She finished her dance, left the stage and I never saw her again.

This was around 11 PM.  It was too late for the early shift to be leaving so I don't think she was through for the night.  I was there for the next hour and I never saw her.

I do not understand why a dancer finishes her set on stage and doesn't make a tour of the room, smiling at everyone and thanking the guys who tipped her on the stage.  That is when a guy like me was most likely to flag her down and get some private dances, which is the only way these girls make any real money these days.

When she left the stage, I assumed she was going to get dressed, freshen up a little bit and come out and work the room.

Twenty minutes later when she hadn't showed, I asked a waitress to go tell her she had a customer ready to buy dances.  The trouble was I couldn't tell the waitress her name.  I tried to describe her but the waitress couldn't figure out which dancer I was talking about.  It was too late to say "two dancers ago" or "four dancers ago".

I tipped the waitress and she went to the disc jockey to ask if he had a list of the last five dancers because I figured she was one of them.  The disc jockey was no help.

This club does not do roll calls on stage.

After more than an hour of not seeing this dancer, I left.  It was her loss.  I had a lot of money on me and I was ready to spend a lot of it on her.

When I got home, I had a message from a dancer at another club telling me how she was thinking of giving up dancing because she wasn't making any money.  Things are rough these days but I think a lot of it is that no one is training these girls how to do anything but take their clothes off.

Saturday, September 13, 2014

Dancer's Complaint

I dance at a Deja Vu.  Things are tight but I've always been able to rely on one special customer who comes in once a week to see me.  He is my true big spender.  Every Thursday night he comes in when we run the $100 half-hour and he buys at least two and sometimes three.  Then he tips me at least $100 and often $200 and on my birthday two months ago, he gave me $400.  Obviously, I count a lot on this guy to help me make my rent each month.  He sometimes spends another $100 or $200 on tipping other stage dancers or getting privates with them.

Last night, he came in and we did three half-hours dances and he tipped me $200.  After we came out, we wanted to sit and talk a while so he sat down on a couch and I went back to the dressing room to freshen up and put the money in my locker.

At this Deja Vu, they have all sorts of special deals about sitting in certain booths.  I have never understood them and neither have any of the dancers I asked about this.  It seems you have to pay a certain fee to sit in the booths on one side of the room.  In all my time dancing at this club, I think I've only seen one or two parties sit there on a crowded Saturday night and I don't think they paid for the privilege because they knew someone.

My great customer sits on the couch waiting for me to return and while I'm gone, a manager goes up to him and says that's a V.I.P. couch and he can't sit there.  He wasn't hurting anyone and there were no V.I.P.s in the club who wanted to sit on that silly couch.  There's nothing special about that couch. and the club was practically empty.

My customer got annoyed at the manager's tone and he said, "Fine.  I won't sit anywhere in this crappy club of yours" and he said he wouldn't be back and asked him to tell me the same thing.  Then he walked out.

When the manager told me about this, I thought he was crazy.  This was a guy who just spent $500 in the club and who dependably spends at least that much each week and they're driving him away because of some stupid rule about a stupid couch that no one ever sits on anyway at a time when the club is almost empty!

The manager tells me rules are rules, which is bullshit.  I see him bending rules all the time for his friends.

I don't know what to do about this.  I'm not sure I can survive without this customer's weekly spending on me.  I would contact him and beg him to come back but don't have any way of contacting him.

Well, one of the first rules of being a dancer these days is to get an email address or cell phone number for any steady or affluent customer.  A lot of dancers set up separate email accounts like with GMail for their dancer correspondence.  Some of them even get a separate cell phone like one of those pay as you go cell phones they sell at Walmart so they can stay in touch with customers without giving out too much personal information or mixing their business with their personal lives.

What if you suddenly had to change clubs?  How would your regulars find you?

I spoke recently to a dancer who has this down to a science.  She has a separate cell phone number.  She exchanges this number with any customer she wants to have come in and see her.  When she gets to work, she takes a nude selfie that doesn't show her face or has one of the other girls take it for her.  Then she texts the pic to some guys with a little message that says "I'd love to see you".

It reminds them that she's at work and that she's naked.  She thinks half her customers are there because of these messages.

She occasionally works different clubs.  She sends out texts to tell the guys where she's working and when.

So that's the second thing you're doing wrong.  The first is you're working for idiots.

I swear, I have heard so many stories of stupid strip club managers, I'm sometimes ashamed to admit I used to be one.

The guy's first mistake was probably that he's unaware of who the big spending regulars are in his club.  You cannot make intelligence decisions if you don't know that.

If he did know that guy was a big spending regular and he pulled that shit about the couch anyway, then he's really a moron.

Strip club managers need to understand they are in the ENTERTAINMENT BUSINESS!  Their number one concern is to make sure the customer feels welcome and has a good time.

You say he lets his friends sit on that couch without paying.  He should treat every guy who walks in like his friends.  He should especially do that with a guy who is spending $600 or $700 every week!

There's nothing you can do about idiot strip club managers but you can build up a customer list.  If nothing else, that will help you if the manager drives you to another club.

Friday, September 12, 2014

Roll Calls

At the club I frequent (DVNH), they use to do stage roll calls (blue lights) on the hour, during daytimes. At night, it is usually every 30 minutes, sometimes as much as every 15-20 minutes.

But now during days, they NEVER do stage roll calls. They do blue lights on the floor, but have don't do stage roll calls.

Does it make much strip club business sense NOT to do stage roll calls? For me, I don't like it, because I don't get to examine the merchandise before getting a dance. And the girls usually never come out.

What do you think? Good or bad for business NEVER to do stage roll calls.

I have been to Deja Vu North Hollywood though only in the evenings. It's a good club but odd in that sometimes, it's packed and sometimes, it's empty and the girls I asked all said they had no idea why the crowds were so unpredictable. There are some nights when there are 20 girls on the stage and 3 guys in the house.

I don't really understand their roll calls. They hustle all the girls out there and the girls stand there awkwardly, clustered together so you can't really see them. (It also doesn't help that they keep their stage too dark with too many trick lighting effects).

Then the D.J. calls off some names of girls that his computer screen tells him should be on stage and sometimes aren't as the girls walk off. No attempt is made to identify any of the girls by name which might help if some guy saw a girl he liked and wanted to ask a waitress to fetch her.

Sometimes, a guy gets up on stage with them and acts like anyone gives a shit about him being up there. If I was managing a club right now, I would do away with that and with the stupid bit where they bring up a guy who's having a birthday party or bachelor party and have a few girls give him a lap dance then have him give one of them a lap dance. I know it generate some tip money for the D.J. but it's stupid and audiences hate it. My rule would be nobody on the stage who has a penis.

I don't think it makes any sense to not do roll calls and it doesn't make a lot of sense to do them the way DVNH does in the evening. Try having the girls parade across the stage in a line and be identified by name. There are many good things about that club but they should light the stage better and give you a chance to see the girls and to know their names.

BTW, DVNH has two big TV screens on either side of the stage that run promotional videos. If there's no cute woman on stage and you're bored, try watching the videos and see how many spelling mistakes you can spot in them. There are usually a lot of them.

Saturday, September 6, 2014


Do you tip a fixed percent or do you reduce the percent if you get more dances. For example, if I get one dance that costs $30, I may give $40. However, if you get 6 dances, then $240 seems excessive.

I don't have a fixed percentage.  It's kind of an instinctual thing and it sometimes has a lot to do with how much money I have on me.

The main consideration is whether I want to see this dancer again.  I will tip more if I do.

A few nights ago, my friends and I stopped in at Deja Vu North Hollywood and I got a $100 half hour from a very cute young lady.  She got totally naked immediately and spent the half hour climbing all over me, letting me touch everywhere and acting like she was enjoying it as much as I was.  There was some light kissing and she paid plenty of attention to the front of my pants.

This was as much as I would have expected in this club.  Dancers are taking a big risk to go farther than that.

I tipped her $50.

BTW, my current lady friend is a former dancer.  She is traveling a lot lately and is away and she knows that I go to strip clubs when she is away.  She always says "Make sure you tip them well".

Friday, September 5, 2014

Letter of the Month

How do I get the strip club in my neighborhood closed down?

The neighborhood I live in has a strip club that is helping to ruin my neighborhood. Shootings, robberies, drug usage/sales, prostitution, assault, sexual assault, and a murder have all taken place at this club in its 8 years of existence. This club is down the street from a high school and middle school.

I have been inside and spoken to some of the dancers. Some of them are students trying to make money to complete their educations. Some are single mothers who just want to make money to support there children. One of them told me she was dancing to save her mother's house from foreclosure. Yes, some of these girls have sympathetic stories.

Yet, a few were on drugs. One got rather nasty with me, because after telling her I didn't want a dance I ONLY gave $5. A lot of them seem unmotivated to get a real job.

I'm very liberal and believe anyone that wants this sort of thing should be permitted to find it, but not in my neighborhood.

How does one go about getting this out of their neighborhood? I apologize if you take offense to my feelings toward this.

I don't believe this message is legit.

If the club has really had shootings, robberies, drug usage/sales, prostitution, assault, sexual assault, and a murder, then the police should have closed it down long ago.  Do you think they would allow a McDonald's to stay open if it had a history of shootings, robberies, drug usage/sales, prostitution, assault, sexual assault, and a murder?

I also don't see why you're going inside and patronizing a place that has had shootings, robberies, drug usage/sales, prostitution, assault, sexual assault, and a murder.

If you are a casual visitor, I doubt any dancers would have let you know they were on drugs or that you'd learn a lot about why the girls are dancing there.

It's also kind of assholish to say it's fine for horrible, dangerous business to exist as long as it endangers other people and not me by being in my neighborhood.

If your story is true, then call the police and ask them why a business is allowed to operate that has shootings, robberies, drug usage/sales, prostitution, assault, sexual assault, and a murder.

I don't take offense to anything except that you think I'd believe your story.  My position is that any sort of business that does have shootings, robberies, drug usage/sales, prostitution, assault, sexual assault, and a murder should be closed.  It should not be closed if all that happens there is that men get to pay to watch women dance nude.

Wednesday, September 3, 2014


Another dancer tipped me off to your site and I find it very useful and helpful.  I dance at a club that I usually like.  It is really the only club around for me to work.  The other choices are either too far or there is something wrong with them.  I had a bad experience working at one of them and I know about the others and am sure I would not be happy at them.  Here is a problem I just had at the club where I work and I hope you can advise me on it because moving to another club is not an option.

The club charges $40 a dance and the dancer gets half plus keeps all tips minus the tip out.  I have a regular who is one of my best customers.  He comes in at least once a week, gets 6 dances and lets me keep the change from $300.  He is also very nice on a personal level to me.

Last week, he came in and we did what I thought were 7 dances.  He said it was 6 but this guy Al who monitors the lap booths agreed with me it was 7 so the bartender told the customer he had to pay for 4.  He was pissed but he paid $280 instead of $240.  My tip was $20 instead of $60.

After he left, I told Al I wasn't sure it had been 7 dances.  Al said, "It wasn't.  It was 6."  He said it was club policy that when the number was in dispute, everyone had to say it was the higher number.  He said that if he thought it was 7 and I thought it was 6, I was supposed to lie and say it was 7.  He said, "We always charge the higher number."

This policy cost me $40 and that's bad enough but it may have also cost me this regular.  He hasn't come in since then.  He looked annoyed when he left like it really mattered to him even though he still spent the same amount he always does.

Do you think my club is wrong?  What should I do?

Your club is wrong.  In fact, your club is stupid.  In a dispute, you always go with the lower number.  This applies to everyone but it especially applies to a good tipping regular.  It is idiotic to piss off a guy who comes in at least once a week and spends $300 even if the club only gets $120 of it.

What should you do?  I would politely let the manager know that his policy cost you a regular like that.  Maybe he will learn from the experience.  If he doesn't, you are stuck with working at a club that does something stupid.  In the future, you might try counting dances more accurately so a dispute doesn't arise.

Saturday, August 23, 2014

New Job for a Dancer

My girlfriend is planning to quit working at a no extras club in a year.  She has worked there way too long - 10 years and she realizes she has to get out.  But she is scared to do this as she has not had a real job ever.

Any advice on how to make this transition easier?

Her first problem will probably be that her new job will be stricter about schedules.  One of the appeals of stripping for many women is that most clubs are not that strict about girls being on time and you can often take off a night or day whenever you feel like it.  It is not likely your girlfriend's new job will be that flexible.

She might make her transition easier if she works towards maintaining a rigid schedule in her strip job.

She will also have to develop a decent look for her makeup each day.  She probably won't be making herself up as much at her new job as does in the strip club.

She will have to understand a new kind of job performance.  Just what that will be will depend on what her new job is but it will certainly not be the same as selling a certain number of lap dances per shift.

She will have to remember that in her new job, she is not a woman to be ogled or fondled and she will have to not invite that.

Lastly, if her job involved interacting with the public, there may come a moment when someone comes in who will recognize her from her old job.  She will have to be prepared to deal with that and to not get flustered or panicked.  If she looks different enough, she might get away with denying tat she ever worked in a strip club.  If not, she may have to whisper to the customer and ask him to please keep her secret.

She probably will not want her new employers to know about her old employers and will have to have a good answer to the question of where she worked the last 10 years.

Sunday, August 17, 2014

Leaving the Girls Alone

I recently got fired from my job at a strip club on trumped up charges of sexually harassing entertainers.

The truth was the owner's friend needed a job and mine became available all of a sudden.

Did you ever deal with this situation in the past and how was it resolved.

I had to deal with employees sexually harassing dancers.  In those cases, the charges were not trumped up.  In one case, it was a guy who on his first week on the job began to saying to the girls "Suck my dick or I'll get you fired".  I had told him when he was hired that we didn't do that kind of thing but he thought that was just a speech I had to give for legal protection and I didn't expect it to be followed.

When I told him it was true, he looked at me like I was crazy and said "Why the fuck would I want to work here then"?

I did have the owner sometimes ask me to find a job for a friend or a relative but I never had to fire anyone to make room for them.  Those people never worked out, BTW.  In one case which I think I related here, the guy really began hitting on the girls and he had to go.

I don't know what to tell you about your situation except that you were probably fortunate to get out of that place.